Dear Ask a Feminist,
I grew up in a small, insular Mormon community and as such, have often felt alienated for my professional ambition, education, liberal views, and profound sense of social justice. After years of internal debate, guilt, and confusion, I have finally reached a level personal resolution regarding my place in the church. However, even though my internal struggle has subsided, I have still felt very isolated in the church culture. Finding this website and viewing the profiles of the beautiful and intelligent women (and man) on the board of WAVE has provided me a sense of connection and hope that I have previously not found in my experience with the church. I am thrilled to learn that my point of view is not only shared by others, but is being advocated.
My question then, is how can I be formally involved in this movement? Is there a general membership? And if so, how do I join?
Kind Regards,
Small Town Gal
Dear Small Town Gal,
Your story is inspiring and resonates with many of us here at WAVE. We too have come to individual resolutions that help us sustain our faith and activity. We have also felt the isolation and alienation you speak of. Hopefully together we can make a difference in the lives of all the women like us out there!
First, recognize that LDS WAVE is a new organization. We are testing things out and trying to find the right balance of advocacy and faith. We want to succeed in our endeavor and so the process is sometimes a little slow. We would love any feedback and ideas that you have. That said we have some really exciting things planned and ways for you to get involved!
We would love to have more personal stories of your life and how you have been impacted by religious gender inequality and how you have dealt with it. We hope that by posting these stories on the HOPE blog that we will inspire others to realize that they are not alone. You can send these stories to: hopeideas@ldswave.org
Also, we are planning weekly, monthly, and large scale Calls To Action that will be effective in promoting gender inclusiveness and also fun ways for you to find and integrate into your local community of Mormon Feminists. There are a lot of us out there and half of the problem is just connecting with and supporting each other. I won’t spoil what we have planned already—so keep checking back with us—but we would also love more ideas of actionable things we can do as a community of women. Please send your ideas to: calltoaction@ldswave.org
One of the biggest actions that we are currently involved in is finding, collecting, and collating quotes from female spiritual leaders in our Words of Wisdom project that we can incorporate into church meetings, visiting teaching, and family home evening lessons. Everyone benefits from the increased voice of women and we look forward to receiving quotes that have helped your life: wordsofwisdom@ldswave.org
Our Women’s Service Mission director is very active in finding ways that we can advocate for justice, equality, and contribute to our local communities. Please join with her as she posts an action each month that you can be a part of. We are also dedicated to social justice and would love to hear some of your ideas on what we can do to help. Also, you can let her know the happenings in your own community, so that she can help advertise and connect people in your area who are interested: sevice@ldswave.org
One of the easiest ways to spread the word is to link to our website from your facebook, blog, or email. Many of our fellow feminists have told us amazing and sometimes sad experiences they’ve had by just sharing their interest in WAVE. Just having your friends and family realize that they know and love a Mormon Feminist makes them rethink their relationship to feminism in particular and religious inequality in general.
And don’t forget, I always love a good question: askafeminist@ldswave.org
Sincerely,
Ask a Feminist
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Dear Ask a Feminist,
I respect your position and thoughts about equality in the Church. I’m sure you have thought these issues through and have expressed yourself carefully regarding them–which in fact you do very well. I certainly agree with some of your comments–especially regarding the humanness of all of us who live and lead–whatever the position.
However, I do feel that some of your statements are confusing and difficult to reconcile and understand. For example you stated the following regarding decisions you make for you and your family:
(Beginning of your quote) “This is the Lord’s direction for me. I have always prayed and pondered every decision in my life and along the way I have been led and directed to working. I recognize that many stay-at-home moms followed this same plan and I respect the Lord and personal revelation too much to assume that we all get the same answers. I trust that all women seek out a(nd) follow their inspired path. For me, it was recognizing and pursing my spiritual gifts and the desires of my heart. I have unique talents and abilities and I feel like they are being utilized in my current profession. My husband and I have prayed and come to decisions about professions and parenting together which we feel are in line with the gospel and the Lord’s plan for us. Throughout the course of my career I have had many answers to prayer, priesthood blessings, and divine interventions which have confirmed that the Lord is directing me.” (end of quote)
You have expressed yourself very well and I’m sure you are confident the Lord is guiding you in your personal decisions. I certainly do not question the process you have used nor the decisions you have made. It is your right within your personal calling and stewardship to to come to such conclusions. You would have every right to be offended if someone tried to persuade you that “the many answers to (your) prayers, priesthood blessings and divine interventions” that confirm the Lord is directing you is a mistake and that in spite of your sincere and spiritual seeking of God’s guidance that you have taken the wrong course.
My question is that if you feel confident that the Lord is guiding you in your life and stewardship, why shouldn’t we feel the same confidence that the Lord is guiding our Church leaders (men and women), especially those we consider Apostles and Prophets in their calling and stewardship? I am confident that they would declare as you have that they have sincerely and prayerfully sought the Lord’s guidance in the important matters before them. If you feel confident in the inspiration you receive for your callings and stewardship, shouldn’t we Church members feel the same confidence in our Church leaders who establish Church policy and practices in their callings and stewardship?
Your extensive list of inequalities seem to be in the category of something other than “a few human errors.”
I sincerely do not want to come across as critical of you or what you say. I have no doubt of your sincerity and strong feelings, However, it is just difficult to understand and reconcile some of your statements. Even though you may not intend to, some of the statements leave an impression of superiority—that perhaps your inspiration is greater or better than others with a stewardship and responsibility of their own.
Thank you for listening and best wishes,
Left with questions!